Being married to a Master is certainly no ordinary life. The Mohanji Factor is hard to define. Can we really understand the Divine through the narrow lens of our limited faculties? In this (two part) blog, Biba Mohan opens a window into her home and heart, sharing precious glimpses and perspectives of life with Mohanji.
The intention behind this text is to share with you how the great challenge – and even greater blessing – of being married to Mohanji truly feels. I do hope this will dissolve the doubts and concerns of some.
When I decided to marry Mohanji, I knew very well that I was marrying uncertainty. There would be no structured living. The regular, clock-work married life was never my cup of tea anyway. I liked challenges and this is surely something we have aplenty.
Five hours after Mohanji and I got married at the Registrar’s office, followed by the usual meal and family gathering, we were in a different city conducting meditation. Some of the relatives were disgruntled and I could not find words to effectively explain why we had to leave early… That moment marked a marriage most unusual in its nature. I knew I was marrying changes, fluidity, out-of-the-comfort-zone challenges and liberation. This was fully in line with my rebellious nature – I always liked doing things in accordance with what felt right to me, what had my inner confirmation. When a journalist from Dubai way back in 2008 interviewed me about my Yoga teaching and movie acting experience, I was surprised to see how she chose to name it – “Rebel with a cause”. I thought about it more deeply and it struck me how true this is.
Not that my rebellion was making me focus on what I am against, but I always stood for my own truth and believed that only when we have the courage to live our truth can our life become truly fulfilling.
Religious dogma and certain societal rules that made absolutely no sense to me did not stand much chance in my world.. For example, when Mohanji and I got married, I felt free to choose my own wedding gown instead of the usual white – I thought “after all, it is my wedding and I should be wearing something I truly enjoy.” The same applied to the choice of the wedding ring. I never enjoyed wearing a ring on the ring finger, only on the middle finger. I came across a ring that truly symbolized our union – two hearts connected in eternal flow of energy, celebrating Love with no hooks, Love beyond all barriers, Love pure and eternal…
I cannot think of Mohanji as a man or a husband. I perceive him to be a being of sheer purpose; a free being who also happens to be my husband, but first and foremost an entity that is here and everywhere, with many people in multiple aspects of being-ness, moving effortlessly between tasks and places.
Very often people cannot see beyond the obvious. They are unaware that they are judging a situation using their mind’s limited faculties. When Mohanji sometimes scolds me in front of others, certain questions soon come my way: “Why is he so abrupt and rude with you?” or “Does Mohanji ever spend time with you? Does he talk to you with love, kindness and consideration? Does he spend time with Mila?” I therefore decided to write a blog on this, to set the record straight.
My answer to that would be the following – Mohanji is objective and totally impartial. He grants me no special favors, nothing more than anyone else receives. I never expect any either because I know his heart and I know his dedication to the higher purpose that he lives for. He is, as he says, “purpose-bound”.
I see that purposefulness happening all the time. Indeed he is like a mirror, filling into the vessel that you bring to him. If you bring anger and a hatred-filled mind, he responds in the same way with laser sharp definiteness in order to blast it off you that very instant. The same principle applies to me in those moments when he scolds me. If you bring love however, he is love and he melts… The mirror called Mohanji sincerely and objectively reflects your own constitution.
Whenever he has uttered sharp words to anyone, I have clearly seen things change in them almost immediately. His presence always transforms and heals. Many people however come with expectations. Those people will also leave with complaints. Expectations never work with Mohanji. He never caters to such desires. He always says “I never intercept or interfere with anyone’s karma. All I do is remove blockages so that they could move on effectively in evolution”. Those who complain have clearly not understood him. When I once told him that his straightforward approach may be taken as rude behavior, he said: “What have I got to do with people? I never do anything for myself. I do it for their own good. I do it out of love and compassion and the need to shake them up, to wake them up from their deep slumber of routine habitual ignorant patterns. I am doing it out of love, not hatred. When someone scolds another out of anger and hatred, it is not good for either party. What I do is not out of anger or hatred for the person. It is out of love. That makes my responses pure and clear. If someone does not understand that and thus decides to leave me, how can I help it?” Indeed, the crucial difference is in the intention – are the reactions based on love or hatred? This should be clearly understood.
Whenever he scolded me, I never felt the usual sensation of the heart chakra shrinking, the painful emotional scarring which is often remembered long after. On the contrary, I always felt something was being removed from me. Some blockage would be cleared, followed by an inner shift, bringing a sense of relief, clarity and blissful lightness. What’s even more interesting is that I do not even remember any of his past scoldings. I honestly cannot remember a single one. And even he will not remember what he told me or anyone else after the incident unless someone reminds him. He always operates in the present, sliding to the next and next event effortlessly. Nothing stays in his canvass as he glides through life. Nothing can hold him beyond the specific time. This, I must say, is the unique quality of a Master – if a Master cannot scold his disciple and prick the balloon of his/her ego, then he is no Master.
Sugar-coated words due to second agendas are the quality of politicians, not spiritual Masters. Every true disciple should recognize the value of scolding and accept it with gratitude, for nobody can fight the in-built ego mechanism, but a Master can. In my case, the situation is unique and slightly more challenging because my Master is also my husband and when disagreements happen all wives like to be right at least sometimes. 🙂 However, I don’t have that right – and can’t complain either cause that was my own conscious choice!
I have witnessed something beautiful about Mohanji in many life situations till date – he carries no anger, hatred or enmity towards anyone. He just responds to situations objectively and moves on. One day he said “Look at the birds and animals. They accept life situations as they come. A poor cat was hurt in a traffic accident. Its legs were broken. It dragged itself to one side of the pavement and licked its wound. It stopped crying almost immediately and started handling its new situation. Look at its objectivity! Why are we so resistant? If it was a human being, he/she would instantly find someone to blame and make the given situation worse. Lack of acceptance of what is given is one of the primary causes of human sorrow. Nobody ever gets anything that he/she does not deserve. So, acceptance of reality is important in order not to be stuck with a place, person or a situation.”
Indeed, it is our resistance that leads us to the blame game, to sorrow and self-pity. But this does not apply to Mohanji. This was especially noticable during the times when he worked in the corporate world (until mid 2012). Wherever he worked, he never waited for others to complete his work. He used to work hard, day and night, and never switched his mobile phone off (I must admit, I was not too pleased with that…). Always available and ready for work! Despite his hard work and despite bringing a lot of new business to his company, his management often treated him in an unjust manner. He would just brush it aside and say “I operate in my capacity and they do so in theirs. Life moves on.” Mohanji brushed off the injustice and left them to handle their own karma. The same applied to those who cheated him or let him down in life. He just detached from the person, place or event and moved on. Total acceptance and objectivity was obvious in all his work. He always used to say “If you are good in what you do, you will be in demand. The sun cannot be hidden even by the thickest of clouds for long.”
Mohanji is a thorough introvert. I know this better than anyone else. He likes to be left alone. I always remember a story from his childhood – when a primary school teacher asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up, he said “I want to be alone.” This made the teacher brand him as a retarded child! I am sure her opinion would have changed if she could see the Mohanji of today. As the number of people coming to him has increased manifold over the last few years, his private time has become increasingly precious and limited. He never complains. He only requests discipline and understanding from people. At the same time, Mila and I are not just brushed aside. He never misses even the minutest detail and always ensures that we are taken care of and protected. He attends to us, wherever he is, in one way or the other, often through someone. All I know is that in the end our problem gets solved. Bear in mind, he does the same with almost everyone who is connected to him. Can you imagine the size of his workload in this world?
The numerous testimonials coming out each day through mails and blogs are a true reflection of what Mohanji is to the world. He is the same to me. He means the world to me. To many people across the world, he means the world to them too. He has touched many lives over the years. Many people have come and at the same time many have left disillusioned too. As mentioned above, it is usually those who come with many expectations that leave disillusioned. Mohanji used to tell me: “This person will not stay. He has come with expectations. I cannot fulfill his desires. This is against his karma. I will not do anything against his karma.” Mohanji always stays with the truth and ethics of spirituality. I have seen him doing things which even made him sick and bed-ridden – people would come to him with serious problems and out of sheer compassion, he would remove their affliction and bring it onto himself, leaving them liberated. This used to worry me. Then I would remind myself “He knows what he is doing. He has clarity of purpose and a will of steel. I should not interfere.” Still love would overwhelm my heart.
As I sit down to write my thoughts, a thousand faces travel through my mind. The faces of those whom Mohanji has touched over the last 7 years since I have known him. He has empowered thousands. He has touched so many lives across the globe positively, blessing them with exactly that what they were lacking in order for them to evolve further. Moreover, spirituality aside, he has enriched many people’s lives through consultancy work without any expectations. One can actually touch and feel the “Mohanji Factor” in people’s lives even though some may not want to accept it due to their ego. But, as I write this, I know that his existence on earth has empowered and continues to empower thousands. What is a life worth, if it is not lived for others? Many people have written blogs and sent in testimonials about the “Mohanji Factor” in their lives. Many have chosen to ignore it, calling it coincidence. I sincerely feel pity if grace cannot be received and cherished gracefully. Mohanji has always kept on delivering in whatever form he chooses. He has never expected anything from or cared about those who love him or criticize him. He just made himself available and kept on delivering. The Mohanji Factor continues to touch many lives every moment. Needless to say, it makes me proud to be a part of this mission, to be a part of this grand movement of unconditional love.
Mohanji has always believed in delivering fully and completely at all times, without any scheming or second agenda. But if there is one thing that Mohanji detests in people, it is artificiality, along with pretention and masks. Without naming anyone in particular, he would often say “These people need nothing from me. They will get nothing. They do not care for liberation. They are wasting my time – I can give them nothing. They came to share with me their pretension and insecurities. Some of them have come to compare me with another. I have nothing to do with it. They wasted my time and theirs.” On another occasion, I heard him tell someone on the phone “Oh, she has nothing to do with God realization. She is just after some spiritual sensations. I am the wrong person for that. My path is that of annihilation of everything and merger with the supreme. All she needs for spiritual elevation, if that is her true choice, is a conscious shedding of her pretensions. She can reach the highest only by shedding her masks.”
Some of my friends tell me “You are like a single Mom. Your husband is never around.” That may be true physically, but Mohanji makes his presence felt to us in numerous ways all of the time. My husband called Mohanji is handling a large mission, connecting continents and a multitude of beings. He works more than 18 hours a day. He sleeps very little. Even if he sleeps, the same is used for a purpose which is not personal. In the moments when I would witness his barely noticeable breathing and enhanced radiance (signifying astral travel and work on other planes) I would be reminded that this is what I asked for and got blessed with – so how could I ever complain? I could not possibly imagine all the challenges that would come our way, but was mentally prepared to accept all that would come with this decision. We even lived together for three years before we actually got married. I knew that he would belong to the world and I was happy that I would get to serve the world through him and together with him, which is what I always wanted to do in life. When I asked Baba in 2006 for a Master as a husband, what I actually meant was ‘May I marry only if that will further enhance my service to humanity and elevate me further. Nothing compares to a union through which one can celebrate and serve Love.”
(to be continued…)